When the ocean’s waves turn pink
and the sun has polka dots
When cars are made of bubble gum,
and cows are astronauts…
When a dollar will buy Texas
and a dog’s hind legs are straight.
When apples taste like cottage cheese,
and God’s love turns to hate…
When Ford attaches fenders
of their cars with Elmer’s glue…
Then, and only then, sweetheart,
will I stop loving you.
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